ADVERTISEMENT

• (505): View more from New Mexico

  He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.

  Fav 11 5609 1345

  share tweet
  

• (210): View more from Texas

  I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up

  Fav 30 5632 1505

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (720): View more from Colorado

  and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.

  Fav 21 1421 5184

  share tweet
  

• (732): View more from New Jersey

  Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?

  Fav 10 2965 946

  share tweet
  
• 

  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (281): View more from Texas

  In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.

  Fav 7 2561 1771

  share tweet
  

• (631): View more from New York

  I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.

  Fav 5 1966 759

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (732): View more from New Jersey

  got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance

  Fav 8 2503 931

  share tweet
  

• (816): View more from Missouri

  Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.

  Fav 2 1125 733

  share tweet
  

• (860): View more from Connecticut

  He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.

  Fav 3 1518 643

  share tweet
  
• 

  21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (206): View more from Washington

  Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.

  Fav 8 1015 698

  share tweet
  

• (405): View more from Oklahoma

  There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.

  Fav 1 757 460

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (913): View more from Kansas

  I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.

  Fav 4 1440 549

  share tweet
  

• (+49): View more from Germany

  ... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.

  Fav 0 647 341

  share tweet
  

• (716): View more from New York

  40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth

  Fav 2 355 752

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (605): View more from South Dakota

  First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor

  Fav 2 469 323

  share tweet
  

Randomize