butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
please come you make the beer taste better
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
