Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Randomize
