It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
Randomize
