chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
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