Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
