I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
