Just cropdusted the office
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Randomize
