they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
Randomize
