bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
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