two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
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