if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
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