I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
Randomize