did you get engaged???
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
