Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
Randomize
