I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
