What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
Randomize
