Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Randomize
