I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Randomize
