:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
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