You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize