It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I need to calm my uterus...
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Randomize
