Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
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