They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Enjoy the penises
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
