I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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