I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Why did my mother make you get naked?
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize