Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
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