actually, I'm a sock model
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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