Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
