Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
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