She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
