K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
