I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
