he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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