Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
He passed out mid-signature
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Randomize
