I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Randomize
