...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
