sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize