I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
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