ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
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