How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
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