it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
