Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
