So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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