You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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