y did u give ur computer a hand job?
You smell like stripper and shame
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Randomize