Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
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