it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
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