Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize
