I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Randomize
